Twin Tested Life

What activities do you lose yourself in?

It’s funny how a question this simple can stop you in your tracks.

What do I lose myself in?

I hate to admit that not many people in my life right now would know the answer to that. Somewhere along the way, the version of me that sat quietly with a pencil and a blank page became less visible. Life got louder. Busier. Fuller.

But the truth is that I lose myself in drawing.

Art. Creation. The act of making something out of nothing.

There is something about putting pencil to paper that quiets everything else around me. Time passes differently. My mind slows down. My focus narrows to the lines forming in front of me.

It’s one of the few activities where I feel completely present.

Before I had my twins, I had more time on my hands. I didn’t always realize how valuable that time was. Looking back now, I sometimes wish I had leaned into art more deeply during that season of my life.

Not because I think I missed some grand opportunity.

But because I simply loved it.

Motherhood has a way of rearranging your days. My time now belongs to tiny humans who need me constantly. My schedule is no longer wide open for hours of quiet creativity the way it once was.

And that’s okay.

But sometimes I do think about the pieces I might have drawn. The sketchbooks I might have filled.

The version of me that had the freedom to sit and create for hours without interruption.

Still, I don’t believe that part of me is gone.

It’s just quieter right now.

Maybe one day my twins will sit beside me with their own paper and crayons while I open a sketchbook again. Maybe creativity will return in small pockets of time instead of long uninterrupted stretches.

Maybe it will look different.

But the love for it is still there.

And maybe that’s the most important part.

Because even if the world doesn’t see that side of me as often anymore, I still know it exists.

Somewhere between the lines of an unfinished drawing, there is still a version of me that gets completely lost in creating.

And I think she’s worth remembering.

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Thanks for reading. I share daily reflections on twin life, growth, and the quiet beauty of motherhood. Subscribe to keep following the journey.